The most beautiful stage of missionary position sex is when the top lowers himself to rest his chest on his partner’s and their heads – and all the sensory equipment there – come together. Any contrived effects will detract from the intimacy you are achieving. Allow your face to express your real feelings. If an enticing smile feels natural, fine, but don’t fake it. (A way of practising this is to get good at shoulder stands, exploring how your centre of gravity shifts as you straighten and bend the legs and move them into different positions.) Don’t force your facial expression. He might pull them further back across his face and torso, open them wider or reach with them around his partner, resting his feet on his partner’s shoulders or cupping them around his head.
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Once the top has entered, the bottom is free to experiment with different ways of using his legs. Enjoy the physicality of sex and let your thoughts shift from any distractions left over from the day to focus wholly on what you’re doing now. Relax into it and trust in your own and your partner’s feelings. Allow time for the sex to warm up with some deep, slow thrusts, the frictional sensations on either side joining with the satisfaction of filling and being filled. Initially, and for the first minutes, each partner’s face and upper torso might seem a long way from the other’s. The bottom might use his hands and arms to pull his knees close to his chest, or to support the raised lower back, or – if he’s sufficiently yogic – leave them rested on the bed, spread around him. Don’t rely, in other words, on the top to do all the work. He should feel confident raising his anus and buttocks for his partner to see and appreciate. It helps at the start if the bottom can hold his own legs back. Indeed, with the closer emotional involvement, the physical sensations of sex are greatly enhanced. It’s true that the missionary position can lead to the most intimate love-making, allowing each man to see and be close to the other’s face, but that needn’t stop it being great sex.